For the Rapture-minded folks.....

Hokay. Thinking you'll be raised up to Heaven any day now to meet your Maker? Worried about leaving hapless Fido alone to face the Tribulations, rumored to be no walk in the godless park? (Ecclesiastes 3:21: "The spirit of man goeth upward, and the spirit of the beast goeth downward to the earth.")

Now Eternal Earth-Bound Pets, a network of committed animal activists and atheists, will adopt your pet for a mere mortal $110 if you are Raptured within the next 10 years - or, as they put it, "we will step in when you step up to Jesus." No joke. No hoax. So help me God. Or whatever.

"We're saying in very clear language that we do not believe, but if we're wrong, and you're right, then we're still here for your pet."


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


The best part is, the rapture already happened, all twelve perfect people were raised up and we're ALL the Left Behind! The Fundamentalcases missed the boat.

And why not scam them, right? They live on a scam, they're born suckers, any preacher on any Sunday can get these people that can barely afford food, to cough up money for "the Lord". What's $110 to ensure that Fido will get Kibbles & Bits forever?

Then again, if the dear Saint misses the Rapture.......he can always eat his pet. 

My favorite bumper sticker of all time: WHEN THE RAPTURE COMES ... CAN I HAVE YOUR CAR?

Make sure to Baptise your dogs and cats so they too will be eligible for the rapture. Problem solved.

It's such a slick scam. I wonder why the bankers have not latched on to 'Jesus Saves' for an advertising slogan.  After all, Goldman Sachs recently said they were doing the "Lords work".  


Rapture Now! Please.